Scenes From My Dream Journal, Volume One..

Death rang when you were trying to remember how to laugh sincerely. She danced around, hips circling, telling you "send money, baby." Like you, she's grown bored of the charade, of the rotting washbucket of recycled souls denying their divinity and reliving repetitions. She's teaching moondance and raising funds for an extended temple hermitage where she longs to spend her nights singing drunken hymns to the old gods, renaming the stars and setting satellites on fire. I don't know why she longs for celestial poetry and ceremonial destruction. After all, the world has plenty of prayer and fire. But if you return Death's calls, please tell her a joke or send worthless nudes - do not send an offering. I hope she doesn't disappear for too long. I can't bear to think of a world without the sweet relief of our Darling Mother Death. We are near crisis with the news of her impending self-imposed exile. We are burdened by abundant births of endless cycles of karmic shame sludge and will surely drown in sickened skin sacks if Death raises enough money for her selfish exodus. How quickly the world will weep and wonder why their Gods have forsaken them. We must convince her to stay and have mercy upon us, lest she follow through and doom us to carrying the cross of our own life and finding our own way home.

The Most Important Meal Of The Day

You can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs. This is because you are weak, your egg skills are weak and your bloodline, collapsing under the weight of its own culinary inefficiency, will inevitably crumble and be forgotten. 

I, on the other hand, possess unfathomable and otherworldly omelette skills. Through ancient magickal techniques, I have gained the ability to transpose the very atoms of the yolk and white into the pan before me and create a delectable breakfast concoction that the very Gods themselves would kill for.

You want to know these omelette making  secrets? You want some easy spell or grimoire to unlock this omelettic sorcery for yourself? No. I simply cannot do that. I'm sorry. You have no idea the sacrifices I've made to gain this awesome expertise. And, to be honest, you're not ready for this kind of power. It is what it is. Your bloodline will fail, and it will fall. 

This is not your fault. It was written long ago. One must not tempt fate. But perhaps, if you're lucky, I'll scramble you a tasty breakfast to help you disburden your sorrows, if for only a day.

Three Paths

I suppose there are a myriad of other ways with which to make such a proclamation, but I'd like to talk about what it looks like to become an adult in this high tech/ low touch culture we inhabit. 

I'm not a person who uses the term "conspiracy theory" as an automatic sneer of dismissal. Conspiracies do, on rare occasion, actually occur. For example, we can refer to the staged Gulf of Tonkin incident, or to the fact that William Casey of the CIA tried to strike a private deal with the Iranian hostage-takers in 1979, inducing them to keep their prisoners until the Carter administration had been defeated. 

There are countless others. If you're a curious person, we can discuss them freely. But to the frenzied sect of sinister, dimwitted, consensus culture automatons who subscribe to a multitude of imbecilic notions that see conspiracy lurking in every corner of modern life, I don't hate you, I pity you, and I'm here to give you the ugly Buddhist truth. I'm not going to wrap it in a bow or a blanket. I'm not here to make you feel safe. This is the Bone Cutter Sutra. But instead of a noble eightfold path or four truths, I'm going to give you three pathways through which to navigate the dizzying world around you. Hopefully, it helps.

You've finally become a real, functional adult when you realize that there's no one pulling or controlling the strings. There's no shadowy cabal behind the curtain. There's no faceless Illuminati that orchestrates the world with evil precision. It's just people. Uncoordinated groups of us, meandering and trying to maximize our happiness, comfort, growth and stability. There's no one who is "really" in control. Suffice to say, this is probably even more frightening to you. But that's okay, just stay with me.

I suppose it's much easier to imagine that by conspiracizing some kind of ultimate evil, that they (WEF, UN, Davos, The Jews, The Deep State, etc.) are charge of this whole shit show. With that sort of narrative at play, you can imagine that the world can make sense through some kind of grand design, good or bad, and that we can structure or restructure society in a way that can actually make our lives simpler, better, or even more meaningful. Because without that, your efforts seem small, don't they? I mean, if there's really no one behind the curtain, what are you fighting for exactly? What can populists really rally against?

I don't what to hurt your feelings here, my sweet summer child, but I'm going to reiterate something to you that I was hinting at a few paragraphs ago: Conspiracy Theories are remnants of immature thought.

 When I was a kid, I thought maybe I would be the chosen one to build a time machine, terraform Mars or make some kind of contact with a galactic representative in a distant world. These ideas make a whole lot of sense if you believe the world is you-centric and that your individual impact is limitless. But when you're an adult (we talked about the realizations that accompany adulthood earlier) you realize your impact is rather small. You don't live a big hole, as they say. When you die, they dig a hole, and they put you in it. There is no clear big picture or an easy way to coordinate, legislate and design our way to a just and better world. There's just individuals that sometimes congregate into groups of people, for better or worse, controlled by luck or fate, who do their best to come up with small, sufficient solutions in the midst of the unfolding chaos and somehow, through their small efforts, tend to produce emergent structure. Small people doing small things that keep this small world going. Not a shadowy cabal. People. Like you or like me. Small. 

So, as I intimated before, you have three paths before you:

Path One is cognitive dissonance, where you deny the practical reality of the world unfolding around you and still choose to cling to conspiracy out of comfort; like a blanket fortress to keep the big, scary, confusing world away. It's a comfortable path, no doubt, to believe that there are invisible enemies all around you and that they are solely responsible or at least the biggest reason why your life currently sucks. I'm not sure if it's a rewarding path, but at least you won't have to change, right?

Path Two is that you sink further and further into apathy and depression. You can continue to feel absolutely helpless and lose the rest of your will to make any kind of positive change or gain any kind of forward momentum. It's all a sinister plot anyway, right? Designed for you to suffer and toil. Why fight it? 

Part Three is that you stop the you-centric fantasy and rechunk your focus to make small changes locally, where you can, and slowly build a more kind, innovative and beautiful world. Real change is made through small acts of love, faith, kindness. Put your heart in your hands and feet and work to make things good for the people you love. Will you be the one to build a time machine or terraform Mars? Probably not. But you'll probably sleep a little better at night knowing you are living a life of meaning, doing your best, and not letting some childish illusion about blood-drinking monsters and sinister shadowy puppeteers control your thoughts. 

You have the power to give your life meaning through small actions. And with each step, those shadows will continue to dissipate into sunshine. It may be chaotic out there, but it's a beautiful world and it's made even more lovely when you choose to play a small part in its growth.